Perspective is Everything on Bad Days

Perspective is everything on bad days, isn’t it? How you choose to view life and your circumstances can make or break you. As a human, I believe this is essential to growth, and it’s also something I’ve had to learn. I am Christian, so my vantage point might look a bit different than some, but if you read my post from last week about redefining Citziens of Beauty, you will learn that I am now sharing with you this portion of my lifestyle.  I don’t think perspective comes naturally out of the womb; I think it’s learned through trial and error. It comes through hardship, and it comes through getting back up again when you’ve been knocked down.

This week was a crap-hole week. I REALLY want to use another description and a string of other words that might offend you (and my mom), so I will just go with crap-hole. Let me vent for a moment.

My two year old had a horrible asthma episode for five days which left me with no sleep. Lack of sleep makes me cranky. Also, I was on high alert that my son would die. Maybe that’s an over-reaction, but it’s the truth of how I felt. I woke up approximately 9,000 times every night to check his oxygen levels like a good mother. Or a crazy one.

Whatever.

After one ER trip and three Dr. office trips and one billion medications, he is on the upswing. Praise God. I am happy that my two-year-old can finally breathe again and I can stop this psycho mom panic like a champ.

Next, my husband’s tire goes flat, and he switches it to the spare which blows up while driving his car to pick up our kids from school. I am glad he is safe and didn’t die.

Perspective is everything on bad days.

But I was looking forward to hanging with one of my friends during that time, and I ended up having to cancel and pick up all of my kids instead. Why did the tire have to die at this exact moment when I desperately needed this soul refresh?

Then my sandal broke while walking to pick up my child from school.

From there I was just in a foul mood. My kids were exceptionally loud, and my two-year-old was chucking anything and everything he could get his hands on. This throwing of food-toys-crayons and more resulted in my house being wrecked exactly 13 seconds after it was cleaned.

I had to escape the chaos, and so I closed myself in my room, hibernated in the closet, and cried it out. It was an absolute adult meltdown at it’s finest. The ugly cry with hot tears and audible words of frustration saying things like “I have to get out of here” and feeling clostraphic in my own house, kind of situation.

I’ve had bad days like when I miscarried. Those days were dark. Those days were truly bad days. But there was still light at the end of the tunnel. So while I’m whining in this post, I want to make it clear that this collection of days that round out to a week weren’t bad; they were just annoying, and I will get over it soon enough.

But I am choosing that mindset because it is in fact, a choice in how I react to the chaos and annoying days that have surrounded me lately. Perspective is everything on bad days.

I can either crumble under the pressure, or I can rise up. There is rest to be found at the heighth of an annoying day when you don’t think you can walk one more day with your head up. Jesus gives us rest…a deep soul kind of rest.

Here is my perspective and it comes from the vantage point of my walk with Jesus. Mathew 10:10 says this, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

Do I believe that bad days just happen? Absolutely. We have all those days we want to punch in the face. But I also know that you and I have an enemy that wants to suck the life out of us, especially if we are walking towards what God is asking us to do in this life. But there is hope in that reality. I have a God that I can lean into all the more when those annoying days, weeks, months, and years arrive and he will give me life because he is the source of life. I am not doing this journey by myself: I get to lean into the strength of God and and find rest because he is with me.

Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”

Good perspective keeps you (and I) from being derailed.

Some seasons in life require a hard focus like when I gave birth to my kids. More specifically, when I was in labor with my babies and needed to focus through the pain. A hard focus doesn’t mean becoming hard and becoming bitter and pushing people and life aside to avoid the pain. It means seeing a different angle and not letting my emotions sway and dictate how I walk this life out. Seeing beauty in the ashes because perspective is everything on bad days.

My son had an asthma episode, and I’m tired. But, I am so grateful it wasn’t anything worse.

My husband’s tire blew out and it derailed my plans. But, I am SO thankful he didn’t get into a car accident.

My kids are freaking whiny humans, but I know in about one hour I will want to snuggle them once again.

Perspective on bad days Tips

Here are some tips I use for keeping a good perspective

1. The Replay: Stop ruminating on everything wrong and start thinking and thanking God for the good things in your life. Meditate of the word of God.
2. Stop the bad patterns: This comes down to first realizing the bad patterns and then making a choice. You can choose to always focus on the bad and land in the same old up and down pattern of thinking everything in life is horrible or, you can choose not to.  My suggestion would be to go to counseling or join a church community that is committed to walking with you and also committed to nudging you to grow.
3. Pray. You don’t have to be eloquent at this. Just speak and talk like you are talking to a friend.
4. A good Friend: One of my friends said to me recently, “do you want me to be your listening friend right now or your tell you like it is, friend?” I told her the latter because, in my heart of hearts, I don’t want to stay stuck in a downward spiral.

In the end, I am typing this, and I feel wiped out. But God is bigger than my weariness and tiredness. Perspective is everything on bad days. I got a little knocked down this week, but I got back up quick because I can and you can too. It’s good’ to cry, let it out, and release. But I want to emphasize RELEASE. Don’t stay there, it’s good to move forward too. Perspective is everything, and in the end, there is joy in the morning (Psalms 30:5)…so I’m banking on that.

xo,

Kendra

p.s- I couldn’t get any of us in the same photo today. Just wasn’t gonna happen. Better luck next time. I love your comments, let me know what’s stirring in your soul.